Who stole my nips and replaced them with melted minstrels?

I got out of the bath last night and laughed at my reflection. The swollen belly is funny on it’s own but my nips literally changed over this last week. Gone are the nice pink ones. Replaced by what look like melted minstrels! They are so big and so brown! I look at those bottles that you see farmers hand rearing baby calfskin and think yep that’s what mine look like. I could feed a whole herd.

My poor funbags! They are well and truly sunny side DOWN! I need some serious scaffolding to get those puppies looking back up at the sun.

I just need to remember the purpose and that makes me smile and I learn to love my saggy mammaries. I’m not quite at national geographic stage yet but I’m not far off!

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